daylight-calling

In the past..what, year? A lot has happened. I had a boyfriend, we broke up. I went to college, I went to anime boston. I came back, summer was clusterfucky, I went back to school after that almost not happening.
My eating disorder spiraled out of control. I got diagnosed with anorexia-nervosa, and almost got kicked out of school. I was forced into inpatient, had a tube in my nose for a day and a half, did what they wanted, got out and came home. Family drama ensued and i was shipped off to california for 2 weeks, before coming home for a week and now i'm back at school where 98% of my friends have deserted me, boys are still stupid, and i'm not sure if I can handle this semester.
I got subtly kicked out. We're attempting to relocate my mother somewhere since the house is really unhealthy, and I had to question where I was going. I'm planning my own deflowering.

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DORM PLAGUE FUCKING SUCKS ;^; NO ONE SHOULD GET IT EVER.

EEEEVER.

Basically, this journal is to say that I'm still not active on dA [nothing to submit D: equals NOTHINNGGG] and that college is really REALLY busy. I miss a lot of my friends, but I made some new ones, and I'm really happy to go to a school where sexuality, gender-identity and what you look like doesn't matter. Everyone here is really nice, to the point where random strangers will come up to you at lunch and ask to sit with you, if you're a first year, and if you need help with anything.

It's really writing and reading intensive, which, even if its your forte, can be a pain in the ass. Though this institution doesn't believe in letter grades, GPAs or midterm tests defining your intelligence, instead you get a BOATLOAD of essays, research, all that good stuff. And yes, its a real college, and its not shabby. If you're looking for creative writing, anything in science, or anything artsy, this is a definite place to be. Not to mention you can take classes at the other 4 colleges in the area free of charge, and for credit with free transport. Sweet deal, huh? Plus, everyone here is incredibly gay/queer friendly, open about sex, and really into learning.

Hm. So, in the past four months, I think I've changed a bit. Hope, anyways. I've stopped with the trying to FORCE myself to get rid of bad parts, and just sat back and attempted to let good changes happen, which I'm hoping they have. Getting out of CT was possibly the best thing for me, really.



AAANYWAYS. I love it here, yadda yadda.
It's been a while, dA! But..since I don't have my camera, there's not much I can upload D: And not much I feel like uploading. Most of my internets activities have been school related, even facebook to talk to my classmates when I miss a class.

a;lsdksl;ksa in short:

Fuck everything bad that's happened to me since the age of 14. I'd go back farther than that, but NO I LIKE 14 WE ARE KEEPING IT AT THAT AGE.

Fuck me, fuck everything bad that's happened to YOU. Fuck all the crying and angst and fights and financial FFFFFFF and a lot of other bad stuff that starts with F.

FUCK IT. My life may not be going in the exact direction I want it to either, but fuck THAT, too. Bad things've happened that were MY fault, and I'M going to be the one saying FUCK YOU I AM FIXING YOU

STOP THIS RIGHT NOW

STOP THIS NONSENSE.

And then the nonsense will stop and fuck itself and I will watch this horrific porno with popcorn and a lolface.

AND THEN I WILL CRY BECAUSE ITS GROSS D;

A SINGLE MANLY TEAR WILL BE SHED.


HNNNGHHHHHH.

Off to do more midterm essays.

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